February 2008

We here at Punkeys love dogs. They’re loyal, affectionate and keep you warm during the winters. It’s good to know that in the fight against monkeys, despite earlier reports, there still on our side. At least in Matsuzaka, Japan (Occupied Territory) they are. From Mainichi Daily News:

In a bid to curb crop damage caused by monkeys, the Mie Prefecture city of Matsusaka (Not the Red Sox pitcher Dice-k)is setting aside funds to train monkey-chasing dogs, it has emerged.

Included in the city’s general accounting budget draft for fiscal 2008 is 875,000 yen to train “monkey dogs” that will scare away the problem monkeys.

Oddly enough, the term “monkey dogs” does not make me feel any better. It gives me an Island of Dr. Moreau feeling.

The city’s agriculture, forestry and fisheries division has reported increasing crop damage caused by monkeys, and in fiscal 2006, a total of 58 monkeys were captured.

“By chasing the monkeys back to the mountains, we hope to coexist with them,” an official from the division said.

In Matsusaka, two dogs will be taught to chase monkeys at a police-dog training facility in Mie Prefecture over a period of four to six months. (more…)


Is there something strange in your neighborhood? Who you gonna call? Punkey Busters!

If there’s something weird and it don’t look good. Who you gonna call? Punkey Busters!

Out of work? Need cash fast? Looking for something to base the latest reality show on? Look no further than Sify News:

Catching a monkey in Himachal Pradesh (Occupied Territory) would soon become rewarding endeavor as wildlife officials here are thinking of involving the public and giving them a cash prize for catching the menacing simians.

Finally a game show I would watch: Monkey or No Monkey. (more…)

The Punkeys are getting smarter and now they’re more virally resistant!! From EurkeAlert!:

UCL (University College London) scientists have taken a significant step in understanding how retroviruses such as HIV can move between species and the biological mechanisms behind the ‘jumping genes’ which make some monkeys immune. They will now use this knowledge to develop a gene therapy treatment for HIV/AIDS in humans.

The international team of researchers, coordinated by Professor Greg Towers, UCL Infection and Immunity, and funded by the Wellcome Trust, have identified a combination of genes in a species of monkey that protects against retroviruses – a particularly opportunistic family of viruses that can integrate into the host’s genome and replicate as part of the cell’s DNA. The team’s findings are published today in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences (PNAS).

Professor Towers explained: “HIV causes AIDS and affects around 40 million people worldwide. Research has shown that HIV entered the human population from a chimpanzee retrovirus called SIV early in the 20th century. In order for a virus to successfully cross the species barrier and jump into a new species, it first has to bypass the new host’s innate immune system, mediated by a combination of genes and proteins. One such gene, called TRIM5, has been shown to protect certain species from retroviruses – but unfortunately the human TRIM5 gene does not protect against HIV infection.” (more…)

Seems two of the jungles smartest animals have made a devil’s pact with each other. One is a cunning menace, the other a massive monstrosity with a photographic memory. Together, they may be impossible to stop!

United Press International has the chilling tale:

KINSHUSHE, Kenya (Occupied Territory) — Elephants and baboons have been raiding fields in one district in Kenya, destroying crops and putting at least 3,000 people at risk of starvation.

One man was killed by an elephant while standing guard and another man was seriously injured by baboons that showed up while he was harvesting maize, The Nation, a Kenyan newspaper, reported.

“Residents guard their farms in shifts to protect crops from baboons during day time while others take over and guard against elephants at night,” Joseph Meso, the chief in Kishushe, said.

With this Axis of Evil attacking 24 hours a day, they poor farmers can’t possible win. (more…)

Before we get to our main post today, I wanted to thank all the Farkers at Fark.com for visiting over the weekend. Punkeys was highlighted for Friday’s post and we received over 2100 views this weekend. All that traffic made us #1 on WordPress’ Growing Blogs list and we ranked #12 in the Top Posts for February 24th. So thanks for taking a second to stop by and we hope you continue to come back.

Back to fighting the good fight.

I saw this disturbing book at amazon.com called: Nearly Human: The Gorilla’s Guide to Good Living.

Here is the synopsis from the author’s website (with our comments as well): (more…)

The primate propaganda machine gets more mainstream every day. It’s even made it to The Colbert Report!

Seems this guy has written a book suggesting we’re not much different from our diabolical cousins, the apes. 

Vodpod videos no longer available. 

You can read it for yourself by clicking here:

Here is a story about the perfect storm of stupidity. From the Kansas City Star:

It seemed like a good idea at the time.

That sentence never starts a happy story.

Take a gaggle of 10- and 11-year-olds at a birthday party, throw in a couple of rented monkeys and just sit back and let the camcorders roll.

That may be the stupidest idea ever! For the first time, I may feel bad for the monkey in this situation. Imagine Chuck E. Cheese on crack with the faint smell of poo.

“The monkeys hopped from shoulder to shoulder and from person to person,” said Susan Vanlandingham of Leawood, who was throwing the birthday bash for her son, Ben. “It seemed like a free-for-all. … We thought, ‘This is great.’ ”

But when one of the monkeys, a little Capuchin named Wyatt, jumped on a child grabbing for Cheetos, it kicked off a litigation battle that still isn’t resolved five years later. Even today, there is disagreement over whether Wyatt bit the child twice or just scratched him.

It is widely known that you never, ever get between a monkey and a cheeto. Lives have been lost for less.

240-monkey_02-15-2008_2711a5b1_standalone_prod_affiliate_81.jpg (more…)

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