An Air of Uneasiness

More biological weapons testing on the punkey front. From the London Paper:

ZOO managers have taken Brussels sprouts off the Christmas menu after the vegetable caused an attack of flatulence in their gorillas.

The staff at Chessington Zoo fed the giant apes on the seasonal favourite as they are filled with nutritional goodness. However, they hadn’t reckoned with the gassy qualities of the tiny veggies.

Now the zoo has issued an apology after guests at the zoo expressed their horror at the potent smell that started emanating from the gorillas’ enclosure.

Gorilla keeper Michael Rozzi said: “We feed the gorillas brussel sprouts during the winter because they are packed with vitamin C and have great nutritional benefits.

“Unfortunately, an embarrassing side effect is that it can cause bouts of flatulence in humans and animals alike.

“However, I don’t think any of us were prepared for a smell that strong.”

As if the gorilla house didn’t smell bad enough. We always knew Brussels sprouts were evil, now there is proof!!!

 

Thoughts for a New Year

Nothing says it more than this picture:

 

Jihad me at Hello…

Punkeys – if they are not with us…the are against us!

Why do you think the songs says “Come Mr. Taliban, tally me banana”?

 

Watch your nuts!!

More brazen attacks in Hong Kong (Occupied Territory). From The Age:

A 46-year-old hiker was recovering in hospital Saturday after falling 20 metres into a Hong Kong reservoir while running away from a monkey trying to steal her food.

The woman was hiking with friends on Friday when a large adult monkey tried to snatch a bag of nuts she was carrying, according to a spokesman for the emergency services team who rescued her.

She ran away and tumbled down a steep bank before ending up in the reservoir. The woman was taken to hospital with injuries to her head, arms and legs.

The woman and her friends had been hiking in Shing Mun Country Park in Hong Kong’s rural New Territories when the monkey, part of a group of grey macaque monkeys, began pestering them.

Outside its high-rise heart, rural Hong Kong is home to an estimated 2,100 monkeys, the numbers of which have risen sharply in recent years partly because of hikers feeding them in parks.

In September, a 25-year-old woman was taken to hospital after being mugged by a monkey for a box of egg tarts as she got off a bus in another park in Hong Kong.

Apparently you need to protect your nuts when monkeys are around. And nobody wants to lose their nuts…

 

Night Court Nixed

No, the headline doesn’t refer to the Harry Anderson Sitcom of the 80’s (as seen recently on 30 Rock). It has to do with punkeys! They’re disrupting the judicial system!! From the Times of India:

The threat of marauding monkeys in Delhi has forced the authorities to avoid holding evening courts at Tis Hazari (Occupied Territory).

According to court officials, the authorities had selected Tis Hazari court as one of the sites for holding evening courts in the capital.

“The proposal was turned down as several cases of monkey menace have been reported from the premises and the animals might create problems in working of the evening courts,” said an official.

After final discussions, the Patiala House court and Karkardooma court were finally selected for holding evening courts, the official said.

“The monkey menace is not new in the Tis Hazari court premises and several orders have been issued to the Municipal Corporation of Delhi to check it,” he added.

Chief Justice of India K.G. Balakrishnan Wednesday inaugurated the evening courts. These courts will function for two hours from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. daily and initially take up cases of dishonored checks of up to Rs.25,000 where the complainant is a financial institution.

Evening courts were first mooted in the 125th report of the Law Commission and again recommended during the Conference of Chief Justices held in April 2007 as one of the means to deal with pending cases.

They are trying to take down society in small increments. It looks like nothing now…but chaos is coming. Without justice, we are no better than they are. And they know it!